Blog we log: Jennie from Mummyvstheworld.com

Supermarket sweep

I’m JENNIE, and in my blog Mummyvstheworld.com (shortlisted for the Blog Awards Ireland 2015) I take a light-hearted look at the world of motherhood. In this post I laugh about the stress of supermarket shopping with a toddler in tow…

Mummyvstheworld.com
Mummyvstheworld.com

I used to view the weekly shop as a boring chore, but since having a baby, I have now come to think of it as a series of obstacles that have to be overcome. I could compare it to an Olympic event, and in that case,getting home with all the shopping intact is like winning a gold medal. It’s definitely as exhausting anyway…The first mission is to get a parent and child parking space, and if I’m successful with that, then it feels like we’re off to a good start. At least I have room to pull in and reverse out with ease even if I am in the process of singing Baa Baa Black Sheep whilst being whacked over the head with flying toys. There’s also enough room to manoeuvre the trolley right next to the car to get the little one in and out without fear of giving anyone a prang…

Next challenge: no matter how much I feed him before we leave the house the minute we step inside the store I will be faced with a starving child. The trouble is even the snacks I’ve packed in the changing bag won’t suffice; it has to be something off the shelf. Thankfully supermarkets seem to be very understanding about this predicament and don’t bat an eyelid, so I’m obviously not the only one faced with this dilemma. Apples are first on the agenda and while at home they would be washed, peeled and cut into chunks this now goes out the window; the bag is torn open, and the one at the top is grabbed and bitten into like it’s the first thing he’s eaten in a week. Anything else that looks edible is sampled before tossing it back into the trolley now covered in saliva.

Once he is full to the brim it’s no longer a case of wanting to eat the produce but to help carry it. Every item we select I hear him chirp up ‘I’ll hold it’. It is thena case of making some quick judgements about what is and isn’t safe. Some are more obvious than others and unfortunately I’ve had to learn the hard way. While breakables are a clear ‘no’ I had thought that flour was a safe bet; won’t get damaged, isn’t harmful, doesn’t roll, isn’t cold, no sharp corners… I hadn’t taken into consideration the fact he was teething so safe to say he ended up looking like Frosty the Snowman.The aisle I always dread the most is the one we absolutely have to visit: the baby aisle. It is both cunning and cruel that my local store positions the nappies directly opposite the most desirable toys. They know full well that while mums are stocking up on the essentials their children are eyeing up the latest must-have purchase. The occasional whinge that ensued before this has now become a full-blown wail. Distraction is the only answer and it is trial and error as to what will work on a given day; I may have to burst into song, play an impromptu game of peekaboo or race the trolley like he’s on a roller coaster. The security guys watching the CCTV

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The final hurdle is the checkout; unfortunately with many of the packets of fruit and snacks ripped open it is a juggling act to keep everything contained. In addition, any items that are being clung onto now have to be removed from his tight grip so any understanding cashiers that are quick to swipe these through are a life saver. If they also have a bit of banter with the baby, I am grateful for the entertainment they provide while I’m bagging up the goods.With it finished for another week I am just grateful that I have six days to psyche myself up for our next trip…

Footnote: Just got back from today’s shop and he was an angel the whole time! Someone’s reading over my shoulder!

Follow Jennie’s parenting advice at mummyvstheworld.com

maternity & infant